March 2012
159 posts
February 2012
112 posts
Give me 10 reasons to love a person and ill give you 20 reasons not to
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Talking to my mom on the phone
Me: Hey mom I signed the lease for my next apartment today
Mom: oh yeah? HEY KEN WHERE IS THE LIGHTER
Me: Mom so its really cool
Mom: Oh yeah? KEN
Me: yeah its like really spacious and cheap and I really like it
Mom: Hold on dad got out the bong for me give me a second
Me: fine
“When your mother hits you, do not strike back. When the boys call asking your...”
– “Unsolicited Advice to Adolescent Girls With Crooked Teeth and Pink Hair,” Jeanann Verlee (via wewantrevolutiongirlstylenow)
On Evening meals
Grandma calling you: Supper time!
Parents calling you: Dinner time!
Friends calling you: FUCK YEAH SHIT YEAH IM SO FUCKING HUNGRY OH MY FUHKE HURRY UP AND GET THIS KGOIGFUCK ITS DONE
I was just at the mc donalds on 1st street and some dudes were doing like laps in their car around the place and then they were like screaming and yelling and then some guy shot off a gun
classy place!
LITERALLY NOTHING WORST THEN YOUR PARENTS TELLING YOU YOU NEED TO GET A BOYFRIEND
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treeracist replied to your photo: these glasses: too much too little too bitchy?
wtf is up with your eyebrow?
lovely words from my sister as always
Things I enjoy about the Wii:
zelda
Things I Dislike about the Wii:
everything else
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On this years best picture Oscar nominations
So far I have seen The Artist, Midnight in Paris (which I saw tonight), War Horse, The Descendants, The Help, and The Tree of Life.
I liked all of them except for The Tree of Life, which I thought was existential to the point where I couldn’t connect. I felt like it was trying very desperately and purposely to go over my head. And War Horse disappointed me, but only because I did absolutely...
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spunkyballs replied to your post: Find the nearest book and go to the 33rd page. The fourth sentence describes how you Poop.
“But she did not belong to the elite circle of ladies on Chestnut St. who presided over balls, pageants, and teas in their ancestors’ silk gowns.”
I always knew you took really gay poops.
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the only thing that gets me through the day at work is knowing that I will be playing bingo for the second night in a row
all sad people unite (and bring your dabbers)
Find the nearest book and go to the 33rd page. The...
What happens to me at bars
Guy: Hey, you are pretty
Me: Wow thanks
Guy: So, will you buy me a drink?
Overheard waiting in line at Kohls
Woman: You look tired; long day?
Cashier: No, long night. Someone kept trying to snuggle into my bed with me, so I had to kick him out, but then he just kept scratching at the door for the rest of the night to get me to let him back in.
Woman: Yeah, I remember having roommates like that.
Cashier: What? No, I was talking about my dog.
Woman: Oh.
Cashier: ...
Woman: ...
Cashier: Here's your receipt.
hauteschoolmusical:
Oh god I’ve been playing Skyrim for hours I need to be around people.
:map travels to Whiterun:
I feel like if you are over 18 you are not allowed to hold hands at the mall
timtebowsvirginity asked: I miss you and your laugh. I should go visit beautiful Milwalkee~
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